Emerging from Violence

While family ties come undone, separations occur, lawyers take action, conflicts escalate, and daily life turns into a tangle of meetings, discussions, decisions, hearings, files, arguments, faxes and emails exchanged between lawyers, former spouses, independent technical consultants, party-appointed technical consultants, certified emails with the court, appeals, and much much more, hardly anyone notices that in … [Leggi tutto…]

Women write to me about the struggle, the pain, the humiliations they go through in order to prevent their children from being taken away from them; women accused by their ex of being crazy – an outdated term that can mean everything and nothing – in order to prove that they are no longer worthy … [Leggi tutto…]

Cruel vademecum of frequent situations if you ask that you, as a mother or father, and your child be protected when you or your child or both are suffering abuse/violence: If your partner/husband accuses you – using the absurd term worthy of the dark ages – of being “crazy” and therefore of deserving that your … [Leggi tutto…]

A child who hears only bad things about a parent, or witnesses him/her being abused by the other, will grow up to be a man/woman with serious issues. Children see their mother and father as persons who will never betray them, whom they can trust, and who will always take care of them. Their eyes … [Leggi tutto…]

In all cases of separation, children must be respected above all else. Those who do not take them into consideration, who use them to seek revenge for old resentments, or who do not accept the separation do not respect them. Those who do not listen to them and who think that if a child says … [Leggi tutto…]

The process of producing a preliminary expert’s opinion should represent a lengthy stage in the separation or divorce procedure, during which conflicts may be addressed in depth in order to find the best solution in relation to the custody of minors. We should also consider that if an expert’s opinion is requested, it is obvious … [Leggi tutto…]

I often receive letters from mothers and fathers who, after a long and difficult separation, are left with a child who used to love them unconditionally but has come to reject them, to “hate” them, in some cases to no longer want to see them. There is a great deal of talk about PAS – … [Leggi tutto…]

After writing about Narcissistic Bluff Men in Part 1, in Part 2 I will focus on Lying Victim Women. Both categories were extrapolated from the many cases I have come across in my work experience; the name given to this category is the result of specific recurring personality traits, behaviours and intentions. I could also … [Leggi tutto…]

Separations involving children are never a natural process and arrangements need to be made for their well-being. Needless to say, there are many different cases and it would be hard to discuss them all. However, there are two different situations, one involving men, the other one involving women, that are widespread and have given rise … [Leggi tutto…]

The term Alienation rouses clashing sentiments, divides opinions, gives rise to discussions and criticism, and yet there is no denying that there is no other term to define children who are influenced by one parent against the other: these children are indeed Alientated. We could prefer to speak of abused or influenced children, but the … [Leggi tutto…]